IELTS Essay: Information Technologies lead to social problems?

The age of Information Technology has taken a lot of people by surprise. While it has become a way of life for some, others know very little about it and may be unlikely to learn. Eventually we will have a polarised society and this will lead to serious social problems.
To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Our highly informatized era became quite a shock for many of us. At the time one part of society uses new means of information very actively, other people stay in the dark without any chance to make an approach to understanding new technologies. There is a raising awareness of does this problem have a potential danger of slicing the society into two parts which would never understand each other.
It is the fact that many of everyday activities became available for computer users only. For example, if you are a university student, you are supposed to submit your term paper as typed and printed document, they no longer accept hand-written papers. Furthermore, some manufacturers do not distribute information leaflets, but give a website address on their products’ packs, thus only the Internet users can have an access for product details. The last but not the least, the computer skills became a crucial requirement for employment in urban areas.
Meanwhile, inhabitants of rural areas do not need new means of acquiring information. Their work and everyday activities do not demand using computers. For example, a farmer can use radio to hear news and ordinary mail to communicate.
Taking into account the fact not every citizen can use new information technologies, governments would not change the traditional ways of interaction with their people. It is highly unlikely people would no longer have a possibility to vote by filling papers by hand or do other activities, important for their citizenship.
Informatization of society affected those, who have a need of instant information exchange. People, whose lifestyle do not require any haste in communication have an opportunity to use traditional ways of it. I am assured that as long as situation does not make others to change their way of life against their will, there is no risk of receiving serious social problems.

This essay has been checked and graded by the real IELTS teacher. See bellow the teacher's comments:
This is a good essay. The only improvement it needs is length reduction (from 304 words to 250-265 words) and perhaps paying more attention to grammar. Overall, looks like a Band 7 essay.
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